I’ve fallen out of love with writing.
My writing energy evaporated. There one minute and the next, vanished into the mist.
I have an addictive personality and rode the reading, writing and blogging wave for several years. All waves crash in the end.
I opened my scrivener file recently and saw that the last piece of editing I did was TEN months ago. Not good.
It’s not that I’m finished with the stories and they certainly don’t appear to be finished with me. I continue to carry a notebook wherever I go and make copious amounts of notes on plot and characters.
I’m still having fresh ideas, some related to my current WIP and others brand new. My wife is encouraging me to write some children’s books based on stories I come up with.
Sitting down to write seems harder than ever and I know I need to treat this like I would any job. I don’t particularly want to do the day job, but I drive to the office every day. Do my hours. Put in my best efforts.
I’ve never been good at focusing on the editing. I know it’s an essential part of the process and I do know that I need to take the hit and force myself to finish the damned book!
There are some plot holes that I want to correct. Some issues or clichés that I must correct before I take the next step.
I wonder whether fear of failure is preventing me sitting down and finishing this book. Maybe that is what is holding me back.
Shock, horror. A writer with self-doubt! 🙂
Probably more to do with the fact that I’m a lazy sod and generally settle for the path of least resistance and for the last few years, that hasn’t been writing. Netflix has too many good shows to watch, there are too many good video games to play, waaayyyy too much live sport to feast on.
So, what do I do?
I asked myself two simple questions.
Am I done? Can I walk away?
I might have fallen out of love with writing. I might never recreate the excitement and the buzz of those years when I was writing, editing and reading like there was no tomorrow.
Am I done?
My answer was simple. No.
Can I walk away?
I know I need to prove it. Blogging is helping me write again. Helping organise my time to sit down and plan, write and edit something.
Thanks for reading.